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It’s only as good as it’s scandalous
Apollo Ohno is involved in a crash and loses a race and then subsequently wins the gold in another speedskating race after the Korean gold medalist was disqualified. The Koreans threaten to pull out of the games because Ohno actually wins something...or they didn’t win something...or something like that. The Russians win the couple skate by default, because some buffoon in a gaudy fur coat and hair to match feels pressured by her country to vote for less than the best. The Canadians react with complete grace all the while maintaining their snobbish attitude that they are the best and deserve the gold more than those poor Russians. The Russians, feeling attacked and conspired against, threaten to pull out of the games altogether. A small number of Olympians are caught with a brand new steroid, too new to be on the banned list, in their blood system. These athletes test positive for the drug and blame it on some obvious scapegoat such as the altitude. Most of them lose their hard sought after medals.
At the next Olympic games, is anyone actually going to remember that some 16-year-old prodigy beat out America’s sweetheart to win a gold medal in figure skating? Will we remember how America lost in hockey, both the women’s and the men’s team? Or how a proud and inspiring Wayne Gretzsky stood and cheered for his Canadian boys as they won? Or will we think of Chris Klug, the young man who beat the odds of surviving a liver transplant to go on to win the bronze medal in snowboarding? How about Jim Shea, the man with the boy’s face who won gold in the skeleton races in honor of his grandfather who had passed away just weeks before the games began. His grandfather and father were Olympians, too, you know. Ahhh, they are touching stories, aren’t they? But memories fade. All except for the bad ones, it seems. You see, if scandal isn’t involved, we as the American people, on principle, should refuse to have anything to do with it. What would possibly make people twirling around on the ice in little outfits worth watching if something dramatic didn’t happen? And if Michelle Kwan couldn’t reach her dream of finally winning the gold, then I would like to choose to remember the Canadians and Russians fighting a very cold war, excuse the play on words. Seriously, everyone remembers Tonya Harding’s vicious attack on Nancy Kerrigan to insure a gold medal for herself, which only insured her a huge, huge penalty, not to mention a major setback in life. But come on, does anyone really know who won gold that year? Didn’t think so...and the truth of the matter is just that. Sarah Hughes is a cute girl, behaved like any 16-year-old would in winning the medal, exuded all the joy that any gold medal Olympian should exhibit. And yes, she will most definitely go down in history. Michelle Kwan was exceedingly gracious in defeat, smiling through her tears, a seasoned pro before the cameras, saving the good hard cry for the privacy of home. The Americans took from the games more medals than ever before in the Winter Olympics. And to top it all off, Kiss and Harry Connick, Jr., shared a piece of the same ice at the closing ceremonies. But we’re all still eagerly taking in the real Olympics, the one between the countries, the political Olympics, the head-butting and butt-kissing. That’s what counts. Because one can only assume that if Russia and Korea had pulled off the trick of bowing out together, maybe they would have begun the third world war. So here’s to four years from now...happy scandals.
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Last
updated: March 28, 2002 |
